With every Christmas that passes by, I am reminded of a friendship turned sour and the loss of a really good friend, a brother in Christ.
It has been 5 years since we last spoke to each other, since Christmas 2005. The feeling is bitter as we see each other quite often but not seeing eye to eye. Whenever our eyes meet, we just look away. And till today, I still feel horrible that our friendship came to an end. I am still holding on to some thin hopes that one day, our friendship will be restored. I hope that one day I will have the courage to tell him we should just forget about the past and give our friendship a chance. Yes, forgiving is not forgetting. I (together with some other friends) have forgiven him long time ago but for him, I would like to believe that he has too but again, for some reasons, it feels impossible for us to return to how we used to be because he was somehow influenced by a certain person (someone important to him) not to. We have tried all ways to make the friendship work but all our effort fell on deaf ears and hit a blinded heart.
I miss our friendship. I miss our fellowship. And most of all, I regret the loss of a friend and not knowing when will we find our way back to the friendship we once had. I hope he feels the same way I do even though if we will never ever be friends again. I pray that God will open his eyes and heart to see the truth.