To start with, I thank God every single day for making me a SAHM, although I never thought that I would be a homemaker one day.
When I was 5th month pregnant with Isabelle, that was when I decided that I am going to quit working and be a SAHM, for better or for worse.
Here is the story of why I should thank my ex-boss, the push factor of this wonderful decision. Now I clearly understand what 'every cloud has a silver lining' truly means.
I had a weird boss in a VERY non-family oriented company. Even the salary was good, it failed to made me stay. My boss who was a childless man, was envious of me when I broke to him the news that I was pregnant. He started to make life VERY miserable for me in many little ways (I don't wish to mention them here). My days in the office was often spent complaining or rather, pouring out my sour feelings to my kind colleagues (here I would like thank my dear ex-colleagues who were there for me & I could never have survived a day more there without their support & love). I remember I was always telling Isabelle then in my tummy how sorry mummy was to let her 'go through' all that misery with mummy. And not forgetting...the journey to office every morning felt like I was driving from South Pole to North Pole. ARGH!
Below were the list of scenarios & my worries in the event that I had to return to work after Isabelle arrives:
Scenario of Isabelle being sent to daycare/babysitter. Not a big problem as there is a daycare centre few floors below our condominium. BUT... yes, the big BUT... (please see below)
- We will have to be prepared to take emergency leave often as she will tend to fall sick more often, catching flu and cough and what nots from other kids in the centre.
- My boss would not be able to understand these sort of situation and would make my life even MORE miserable.
- Not being to leave work on time to pick her up from daycare will cause somehow rather some chaos
- The thought of leaving a 2 month old fragile baby at a daycare centre, in the hands of a stranger... I don't even want to think about it.
- Hiring a maid and leaving her at home alone with the baby, BIG NO NO.
- My parents deserve to enjoy their golden years after caring for us for a challenging 30 years. So, no, it is not my choice to invite them to stay with me and babysit my baby.
* My imagination .... golden years *
After many discussions and prayers, me and DEAR HUBBY (DH) put a fullstop to my worries and misery. And we decided that it would be best for me to quit even temporarily so that I can concentrate and take care of our little baby at home.
Although that means DH will have to support the family with single income, the decision gave me a big peace of mind and gave DH peaceful ear (because he can finally go to sleep without listening to my sour stories or how bad my day went in the office or my worries about our unborn child).
A couple of agonising weeks pass by, I happily handed in my resignation letter. I can't forget how I felt the moment the letter left my palm! It was a big big BIG relief!!! I can proudly tell my ex-boss in his face, I DO NOT NEED THIS JOB ANY LONGER!!! He asked me to stay till my due date approaches. Oh my.. thanks but no thanks. I am carrying a baby, a precious life in me & maybe additional 10kg of body fat then and I am not going sit around and let you torture me. After a long chat, I walked out of his office, la la la.. I feel I could float despite the extra weight!!!
So, here I am now.. a tired, sleepy but happy and joyful SAHM!
Thank my DH for standing by me throughout the whole journey and for putting up with my silly fuss. ♥